Okay. So this.
I think there have been two instances but I will talk about this one.
I have been happy, a lot of times in my life. Like honest to God happy. I have also been satisfied about my life and where it is headed quite a few times in my life. I have been both too. This is one of those moments, one that stuck with me.
No it wasn’t the time I knew I was in love, the time I had sex, the time I knew the people in my life who mattered, not the time I got into the college of my dreams or when I got my ‘Head Girl’ badge nope. Nope. I mean those mattered, but this was a much simpler incident.
I was in Delhi this summer. It was around 8.30 at night and I was with one of my friends in his car. We were getting back home from a super tiring evening at Hauz Khaz Village. There was so much traffic on our way back home I thought we would be stuck in there forever. Nonetheless I tried to be super duper optimistic abut the whole deal.
Finally we were at this clearing, this large stretch of road which is empty and we have music playing in the background and we speed up. I was sitting next to this boy I had known for four years and had, over those years fallen in love with the person he was and the friend he had become to me and laughing over something silly he said. The wind was in our hair and the lights just the right bright and we were racing into the past we had left and singing into a future we didn’t know. We were happy. And no matter what happened to me I knew I was glad I was where I was. In that moment I was.
We entered the cantonment area and picked up another friend of mine and drove back home. The song changed to ‘Vande Maatram’ by A.R. Rahman. We were at this moment driving towards the flag and the sense of patirotism and satisfaction, which I had never felt in the same breath seized me and the others in the car, we screamed out the lyrics in the car. That night I felt completed and happy. I was with people who loved me, listening to music that filled me, feeling the breath of the air that freed me and my thoughts that completed me.